Monday, December 17, 2012

2 Options: If Your Husband Forgets Your Birthday

At first I wasn't too sure how to write about my birthday.
 There were two options available to me:
(one) Sugar Coat It
(two) Be Real. Honest. Tell it like it is. 
With the permission from my husband (who has proof read this post) I've decided to go with option two. I've said this a few times, but the last 2 months have been the most difficult in our lives. There have been so many challenges but through it all the Lord has been so faithful. At some point when the time is right we may share more but for now we are still in awe as the Lord develops our faith a little more, teaches us both grace in interesting ways, is forever our provider, and is always the source of our joy & understanding. God is always sovereign. 
That is our beautiful peace of mind.

In the midst of everything, I turned 27 on November 25. Seriously, how did this happen? This is madness friends, I am only 3 short years away from turning 30, Augh! Where does the time go?

My birthday was on the Sunday after Thanksgiving which was a bit hectic with all the traveling & Johnny was still not feeling very well as he was getting over pneumonia. Let me just note that we like to do something (not big) just extra fun & rare for our birthdays. The week before my birthday was kinda a wash for Johnny to think about my birthday & to be honest we had both forgotten it was my birthday until 2 days prior. On Sunday I woke up to flowers & coffee from my sweet guy, after church we went to lunch with another couple, then we came home & Johnny fell asleep. All day. He didn't wake up until 8 pm. I was kinda bummed just because we had planned several things for the day but didn't do anything. He could tell I was pretty sad mainly because we had discussed my 27th as a way to celebrate the difficult time we were just coming through as well as saying happy birthday to me. That Monday night after realizing that there was no birthday gift from my man and we weren't going do any anything we had planned I was pretty sad & getting frustrated. So I asked Johnny, "Why?"

Here is the beautiful part. He was honest. Saying, "Baby, I'm so sorry. I totally dropped the ball. With everything going on I forgot about your birthday. And I feel horrible about sleeping through the day & skipping our plans. 
Please forgive me."

One thing we've learned the last few months in our lives is a deeper understanding of grace. Grace towards others, grace in life challenges that we can't control, and the most difficult-grace in our relationship with the Lord. We have learned that as believers that we must give grace in knowing that God is sovereign, even when we don't understand he knows what he is doing. 

I chose grace. Grace to say, "Its okay. My flowers were beautiful. Thank you for apologizing." My husband is so precious & year round does the sweetest things for me that making him feel badly for forgetting my birthday just wasn't important. Ladies, we need to give grace to our men. Our responses dictate the tone in our homes and in our marriages. It is time we realize this & understand that just like we are human, so are our husbands. Let me note, that I haven't always been so quick to give grace but I know how much it means to him & the Lord if I chose that route other than anger or bitterness. 

The next evening my boys returned from a little outing to deliver the first of many surprises that week.
 Johnny showered me with very thoughtful gifts. Each one I had mentioned in little side conversations or while singing a song along with the radio. 
One night he made me dinner & drug our two favorite chairs outside to spend a sweet night together. On the last night our good friend, Jane,  watched our little silly man for us, while he planned a secret beautiful dinner for us. 
oh this child :)
We had such a fun date night. Seriously friends, I am one blessed woman. Although he may have, in his words, "dropped the ball" he more than made up for it. I would never have expected a week like that.

I hope it is okay that we are keeping it real. I am so thankful that Johnny forgot my birthday because I totally fell more in love with him because of it. The best part, he shared with me that he fell more in love with me because of my reaction. Thanks for letting me share my birthday week nearly a month later. Happy Monday!


  1. How sweet to be celebrated all week. I know it stunk to have your bday forgotten and I admire the Grace you gave him! :) looks like it paid off and you ended up w/ a great bday!! visiting from The Networking Blog Hop

  2. you are so sweet my friend. Good job J for making your birthday up to you in such a meaningful way!

  3. What a sweet post that puts things in perspective. It looks like it turned out great! Thanks so much for linking up with MMM today! Newest follower here!

    The Mrs. and The Momma

  4. Wow I love this girl! Love your truth and the grace and love which can totally be seen in your marriage. thanks for sharing :)

  5. Awww, this post is so honest! And so refreshing! You can tell that you two have an amazing love and a forgotten birthday won't change that!


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