Sometimes, it just is.
Praying aloud with others can be awkward. Especially at first.
Even in Marriage, praying can be awkward.
I remember the first few times Johnny & I started praying together (once we were married) and I remember thinking to myself this is nice, sweet, but kinda awkward. Ha. Perhaps y'all are thinking how horrible I sound, but I'm just being real. Over the last few years I've realized how common the feeling of "praying is awkward" is among married couples. Can't tell you how often I hear this. I always laugh, because they have no clue how many believers feel this way. It's just never really talked about.
Yes, Praying is Awkward. At first.
However, the more Johnny & I prayed together the less awkward it felt and the more natural it became. It is pretty common for us to pray together over meals, if we are sick, over Noah every night together, and we usually try to pray before bedtime & often do some kind of little devotion together. Sometimes its just sharing what the Lord is speaking to our hearts that day.
But there needs to be more. Because when there is a lifetime commitment involved - there needs to be more than a 10 minute prayer time together a few times a week to sustain us in the Lord. Life can be distracting, and sometimes we can say we are going to pray together but then we end up falling asleep instead. You know how that goes. Praying in marriage is a commitment One that we have worked hard at, made sacrifices to maintain, and still - at times- fail miserably at. However, we value that time together when we can go before the Lord pouring our hearts out to him about our marriage, community, family, friends, heartaches, and life in general.
There is nothing more fulfilling in life that spending time with the Lord. There is nothing more beautiful, fulfilling, and worth while than spending time with the Lord with your spouse.
A few weeks ago Johnny & I were up at the church early in the morning. The Lord was doing so much in my heart, but it was a time that I just needed to sit with the Lord and not pray. (thats okay too) Then my husband asked me if he could pray over me. These are some of my favorite memories, when my heart is too heavy to speak but my husband prays for me instead.
Three years ago letting my husband pray over me would have been a challenge. We prayed together all the time, but those were like short & quick kinda prayers. I struggled with praying with my spouse because like I mentioned, it was awkward. I was too caught up in me. Not focused on growing. I'm sharing this to say that if your thoughts are, "Praying is Awkward" thats ok. Its actually kinda normal. The main thing is to push past that. Focus on the Lord, what he is wanting to speak to you & through you, remember that you are making a commitment to grow in Him. As you pursue more of Him, you continue to lose more of you. Thats a good thing.
On Monday I shared, After the Vows, a few ways we keep the spark alive in our marriage. Today I want to share a few ways to get started to praying with your spouse. This is the best way to keep the spark alive in marriage.
3 Ways to Start Praying with your Spouse Today!
Set a time. Show up. Pray.
Set a time. Show up. Pray.
for us finding the time to pray together seemed to be our biggest struggle. praying before bedtime, never worked for us. so we re-worked our praying schedule to make it happen. we don't get it right all the time, but the most important thing is that we try.
Perhaps you are like my former self thinking, praying is awkward. Just gonna be honest it will probably be a bit awkward when you start to pray aloud with your man. anything new, is different - or awkward. until you get use to it. I promise after the 3rd time of praying together you won't be thinking that anymore. Instead, you will be so excited to pray together.
Praying with your spouse is the best way to grow together. Go to your local bookstore & grab a couples devotional to go through together. There is a book called Real Marriage that is wonderful. It will be the next book we go through together. (Johnny has already read it)
My hope is that you & your spouse start praying together this Valentines Day. My heart is that you know that you are not alone in feeling "awkward" and don't for one minute think that your marriage is not good enough because you aren't praying together, yet. Your marriage can be so much better if you start praying together.
Johnny & I are not experts, Lord knows that, on marriage but we have come along way in our short marriage. My hope is to encourage you that God wants the best for your marriage. We struggle often and thats okay because we just keep trying to pursue the Lord together. Happy Wednesday.