Tantrums & Smiles

Noah is such a character. From day one he has been full of surprising facial expressions, explosive & contageious laughter, non stop hugs & kisses, and sweet snuggly moments. Not to mention that he is just as silly as both of his parents & both sets of grandparents. 

 Already, by age 2 I have lost track of how many people have told me, "Noah is just so funny & I bet he is going to be the class clown" ha! It is true, he will go to any measure to get a laugh. He is a hoot. However lately this this little hoot has been full of tantrums. Tantrums that are not cute or funny for anyone around. 

(objects)

I am thankful for a little boy who has opinions but I am desperately trying to figure out how to be sensitive enough to allow him to express himself without witnessing him turn into a little stinker that no one wants to be around (including his momma). I know that everyone says that the terrible twos are the worst but good grief. For real? I realize that being a mom does not come with a hand book about how to teach your kids to control their emotions but it really should. Someone needs to get on the ball already and distribute free booklets beside the babies crib in the hospital. 

This week has been so long. Johnny has been pretty busy which means my days are extra long without him. There have been those moments that I just literally started to cry from being overwhelmed. Then there have been many more moments where Noah is his sweet little self, wanting to curl up in my lap for a solid 2 hours and just read books & sing songs. In reality I know and understand that this is a learning time in his little life & in my own. I know that he needs discipline just like I need discipline from the Lord. I continually am hitting the imaginary reset button to consciously reset my attitude towards Noah's emotions & the way to approach disciplining his disobeidence. This job is not easy & I would be lying to say that I have not had moments in the last two days of thinking, "Maybe I should work on my masters now or perhaps look for a job in my field now" to provide an everyday outlet for myself. But as those thoughts pop up I quickly in my heart know that this is the full time job I want.

Getting a little dramatic, I know that this is the point of no return. It really is, if I do not intervene now & continue to do so his behavior will only become worse. I began reading a book my mother in law gave me about a year ago called, Shepherding a Child's Heart. I got half way through the book but at the time I wasn't going through any discipline problems with Noah. It really is such a good book & is a wonderful reminder of Gods grace & how He disciplines us in our lives. That book is about to be read this afternoon. 

This was honest & I hope that you lovely ladies do not think I am a horrible woman. I do know that I am not the only momma who feels this way on occasion & I will not be the last. I have given up on thinking that I will always know exactly how to handle his little attitudes each moment presented. However, I do know that as time goes on it will get easier & I will be more confident in my parenting approach & less of a momma who doubts if she is doing things right. 


To end on a bright note Noah has been calling me Mommy instead of Momma the last day. My heart melts. My little boy is so precious in my life. I truly adore his little stinky self. 

~Brit

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